I met my younger self for coffee. She was early, no surprise there.

I arrived right on time, as I know now not to put so much pressure on myself.

We both ordered a coffee without hesitation, we love coffee. Nothing has changed there.

She had her two kids with her, and while I could see the love in her eyes for them - she looked sad. A little bit lost maybe.

She was married, with two little children.

She asked me if she was ever going to feel truly herself, because she didn’t really know who that was.

I told her yes, it will come. But it is going to be a journey, a tough one.

I told her that she’s going to make some mistakes, and have to make some tough decisions.

I told her that her circle is going to get smaller, and it’s going to feel lonely for a little while.

She responded and said, I am kind of used to feeling lonely right now aren’t I?

I told her there are going to be hard changes, and some big grief.

I told her to hold on tight to the good memories of dad. To sear his laughter and the way he calls you princess into her mind.

Of course she didn’t understand. Her dad is her biggest cheerleader, her best friend - what changes?

I responded and said..everything. And it’s going to break your heart.

I told her how grief would cripple her. And it will change her.

I told her that even when the days seem so dark and hopeless, there is always light.

I told her that she will get through it.

She asked me when. When does everything change?

Soon, I said.

I told her that although most days she won’t believe it, she will regain her spark. And it’s truly incredible.

I told her that she is going to need some help.

I told her that she is going to have to take the mask off.

I told her that she will need to process things she isn’t even aware of yet.

I told her she needs to forgive herself.

She just nodded her head silently like she already knew what I meant.

I told her that despite how things feel right now, and will feel soon that there are so many joyful days ahead.

I told her that yes, there will be pain. But there will also be so much joy.

And I reminded her that through it all, she was enough.

I smiled at her babies and told her that they were going to teach her so much.

I told her that they are why you always search for that light.

I told her that they are going to be okay.

I told her that some days you’re going to feel like you’re doing everything wrong.

I told her those hard days and the way you show up for them creates the most beautiful bond between you and them.

She teared up and bit and said that she believes that.

I told her that she is a great mom.

I told her that the day comes where she starts fighting for herself. And it changes her to her core.

I told her that turning 30 as a single mom does not mean your life is over.

I told her it was actually just the start of an incredible adventure.

I told her she discovered herself. She discovers real joy.

I told her she finds love. Her forever.

I told her that in a few years time she will start to feel like a whole person.

I told her that deciding it was time to heal is the best decision she will ever make.

And then I reminded her that the most important relationship she discovers is the one she creates with herself.

I met my younger self for coffee.

Life Lessons, Motherhood & a Rescue Dog’s Second Chance